The Patriot Post® · 10 People We'd Like to Launch Into Space
Following the success of the Blue Origin space mission that sent Katy Perry into space, many have wondered: why we didn’t shoot her out there before? Who else we could send into space?
Here are the top ten people we at the Bee would love to launch into space:
“Flo” from Progressive: She had a good run. Sorry, Flo.
People who say “all the feels”: Shooting those people into orbit would give us…well, never mind.
Sigourney Weaver: We don’t have anything against her, she just might come in handy in the event the craft is invaded by aliens.
Flat Earthers: Watch out for the ceiling!
The composer of “Baby Shark”:Make it stop.
A crying baby: Just to ruin the trip for everyone else.
Anyone who uses the term “fur baby”: Also, the fur babies.
The inventor of mariachi music: Go where there are no sound waves, friend.
The girl who said she wanted to go to homecoming with you when you were a sophomore in high school, which seemed so surreal because she was a junior and pretty cute, and then when it was time to leave the football game for the dance you overheard her saying to her friend she couldn’t wait to hang out with Lance and it turns out she’d wanted to go with him the whole time and you were just her ride there: She’s had this coming for a long time.
Steve: Obviously.
That’s just for starters. Who else are we launching?
From our friends at The Babylon Bee.